Collaboration means to work together to achieve a goal.  It requires introspection and good communication.  In collaborative practice you work with specially trained attorneys and allied professionals like divorce coaches, child specialists and neutral financial analysts as a team to educate, advocate and guide you through the settlement process. 

What is the process?  How is it different?

In traditional divorce the emphasis is to get what you want, argue for it and prove you're right.  It's rights-based dictated by court process .

Collaboration  is looking at a question; gathering all relevant information in a neutral way with voluntary disclosure; eliciting interests and needs;  brainstorming and evaluating options to problem-solve; and reaching resolution.  It's interest based with a self-determined, out-of-court process.

The skills necessary to guide parties to self-determination are very different from traditional representation and take continual training and introspection on the part of the professionals, personally and as members of a team.

What do you get?

• Legal - Support, Custody of Children, Property Division
• Emotional - Processing grief, developing emotional intelligence and awareness; coping skills;  forgiveness; understanding; empathy and calm
• Financial -Realistic look at financial situation; planning; developing better financial awareness, discipline, knowledge and skills; life planning for earning income
• Social - How to best deal with children, extended family and friends
• Client Centered - It's your process.  You make the decisions with the support and safety provided by the team of professionals.  It's private.  You have the opportunity to look deeply at how things are and how they can be made better; how you can become better.
• Multidisciplinary - A team of professionals support, target needs, educate, offer observations and teach skills
• Interest Based - Helping to look deeply to discover real interests underlying initial demands, creating more options to satisfy
• Joint problem solving- Moving beyond blame to work together to brainstorm options to solve problems

How does this compare to what you thought divorce would be like?   In traditional divorce you are not encouraged to work together to come to understandings about yourself and your spouse that will enhance your future relationship.  Even if there will be no future relationship, what about the anger and bitterness you hold?  Wouldn't it be better to resolve that in your mind, body and spirit - for your own good?

There is a better way.  Expensive, you may think, because of lawyers and other professionals?  What is the value, though, to yourselves and your family?  Can you afford not to?  We professionals work hard to make it affordable for everyone by collaborating together to see how we can work within your budget.  It's pretty clear these processes are less expensive and more efficient than litigation.  You do have more responsibility for the outcome, however. It's not left up to lawyers and judges.  It's your work with advice, support and coaching from the rest of us.  You can do it!

Are you willing to find out more?  Give it a try.  Call for a free initial consultation to discover the potential for you and your family.

Cullen Mediation & Collaborative Law, PC 
Divorce Mediator in Portland, Oregon

503-867-1763